


Playing Pretend

by River9Noble



Category: Batman - All Media Types
Genre: Dead Robins 4Ever, Dirty Talk, Don't say I didn't warn you, F/M, I was reading a dark mafia romance this week and this is what happened, Identity Porn, Jason Todd is Red Hood, JaySteph - Freeform, No it's really filthy, PWP but then a tiny plot and some romance crept in, Stephanie Brown is Batgirl, Tumblr: fyeahjaysteph
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-29
Updated: 2020-07-29
Packaged: 2021-03-05 20:40:12
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,741
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25581478
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/River9Noble/pseuds/River9Noble
Summary: Bruce forces Jason to attend the Wayne Foundation Masquerade Ball, so of course he comes as a crappy Party City Red Hood.Imagine his delight when he finds a Party City Batgirl to dance with...
Relationships: Stephanie Brown/Jason Todd
Comments: 13
Kudos: 99
Collections: Jason Todd Rare Pair Challenge





	Playing Pretend

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the Tumblr fyeahjaysteph July 2020 prompt "Playing Pretend."
> 
> I, uh, was reading a dark romance Mafia fic this week before writing this and... ummmm... some lemony influences from it may have bled into this story (pun most definitely intended.) 
> 
> No non-con, though. Very much con con. 
> 
> Just filthy dirty talk. Don't say I didn't warn you XD
> 
> Edit: I TOTALLY FORGOT TO THANK NOKOMIS <3 who kicked my butt to get this done, reminding me that there were only a few days left in the month!!! Go read their prompt fill too, which is freaking HILARIOUS, it's called "Can't Help Myself"

Jason grinned to himself as he adjusted the rubber band on the back of his Party City Red Hood mask.

Bruce had insisted that every member of the Batfamily attend the Wayne Foundation Masquerade Ball, despite the fact that, as Jason pointed out (repeatedly), attendees were required to wear disguises so no one would know if the Wayne kids were there or not.

Bruce had heaved a sigh and pinched his eyebrows together.

"If I have to go, then you have to go," he said for the hundredth time. "It's important for the entire family to come together and do their part to support the Wayne Foundation. With great wealth comes - "

" - great responsibility," Jason interrupted. "I know, Pops. Blah blah blah. But what's the point of being there in costume if no one is gonna know we're there at all?"

"It's the principle of the thing," Bruce lectured, glancing at the clock and wondering if it was too early to start patrol.

Nothing drove Jason off faster than a tsk'ing Batman making disapproving frowns over his son's use of firearms.

Not that he didn't love his son. He did. But if he had to hear Jason complain one more time about attending the masquerade…

Jason walked up the drive of Wayne Manor and proudly patted the bat he'd DIY'd from red duct tape on the chest of his long sleeved black t-shirt before strolling through the front doors as if he were a guest.

"Good evening, sir," a butler who wasn't Alfred intoned.

Jason frowned underneath his flimsy mask. Al had better be off mingling somewhere in costume, too, or they were going to have words later. If Jason had to dress up, then everyone had to dress up, whether they were the ancient patriarchal family guardian or not.

Red Hood snagged a glass of champagne as he wove his way through the crowds of mermaids and pirates and Phantoms of the Opera and Tinkerbells clogging the hallway while chit chatting over hors-d'oeuvres, and made his way to the ballroom.

Dick had at least made sure that Bruce hired a decent DJ ("Bruce, no," Dick had said weeks ago, his face going pale with horror. "The Gotham String Quartet is _not_ acceptable music for a masquerade party") and if Jason had to be here, he was going to dance with some hot girls, dammit.

He had to give Pops points for one thing - costume parties brought out the secret fashion-slut that every woman had inside of them, who sat waiting impatiently for long months on end, tapping their kinky stilettos and dying for a semi-legitimate chance to escape the confines of decent necklines and fingertip hemlines to go sheer, short, backless, barely there, panty revealing wild under the guise of Halloween or charity.

And Jason wanted to dance with them all.

The thumping bass of club music greeted him as he slipped into the darkened ballroom, lit with disco balls and colored spotlights. He shimmied his way into the pulsing crowd of sweaty, happy, super hot and almost naked dancers and began moving to the beat.

As Jason got his groove on, he found himself perplexed when girl after girl that he danced up to quickly moved off after taking one look at him.

This… was not how clubbing usually went for him.

It was hard to see out of his ill-fitting mask, but he finally caught the pitying glance that one of the girls gave him when she turned to see who was dancing with such sweet moves behind her.

Oh.

Ouch.

As Jason looked around, he realized that almost everyone was wearing a much fancier mask - and costume - than he was. Fancy to the tune of Swarovski crystals painstakingly hand-appliqued on elaborate satin concoctions with swaths of braided trim and feathers and velvet and -

Shit.

Jason had just wanted to have some fun pissing Pops off. He hadn't expected his $2.95 Red Hood costume to make him the wallflower of the ball.

He sighed and began making his way towards the edge of the dance floor, when the most wondrous sight befell him.

A blonde beauty with curves for days and the tightest, shortest purple halter dress he had ever seen, with thigh high purple fishnets and spiky purple heels, was swaying by herself to the music, alone in a barren circle of dance floor due to the ginormous purple Batwings she was wearing that stuck out a good three feet on either side of her body.

As Jason danced closer, he realized that her Batwings appeared to have been concocted from some twisted combination of wire coat hangers, panty hose, and purple spray paint. And… glitter. Definitely glitter.

Her mask, though, was far from homemade.

It was the $1.95 Party City Batgirl mask that Jason had noticed in the store's Heroes of Gotham aisle.

He might get lucky tonight after all.

Jason boldly moved into her space and began dancing up to her. She looked up, delighted to have a dance partner, and when she realized what he was wearing, she gave him a big, purple-lipsticked smile.

"I love your costume," she shouted cheerfully over the music, not hesitating to throw her arms around his neck and begin grinding her hips against him to the beat.

"I love yours," Jason told her, smiling broadly, although she couldn't see it under his mask.

His hands slid up and down her curves as they danced, and fuck, this girl was not only hot but not shy about it, because she happily writhed against him even closer the more handsy he got.

"No one would dance with me," she yelled in his ear before beginning to drop it low, hanging onto one of his hands for balance as she went down.

Jason started to move behind her as she came back up so he could grind against her butt, but he had to pause for a minute to negotiate the Batwings. His arms were not going to get around those, he realized. His Party City Batgirl had made her wings so enormously tall as well as wide that his arms couldn't find a route to her waist.

He groaned to himself and slung his arms over her shoulders from behind instead.

"Your wings might have scared everyone off," he quipped in her ear as he tried to finagle her closer.

Batgirl craned her head around and began to giggle as she realized the issue.

"Dammit!" she yelled. "I didn't test them out with a dance partner."

"I still like them," Jason said, almost purring in pleasure as Batgirl twerked her butt out behind her into his hardening cock with more vigor, since her poor Red Hood couldn't pull her in closer.

As they circled together to the music, Jason realized that having his arms draped over her shoulders wasn't so bad after all, because it gave him ample opportunity to casually dip his fingers lower towards her very, very exposed breasts.

She had to have used some duct tape herself, to keep herself secured in her dress, Jason thought with admiration, because it was a wonder that her boobs weren't popping out of the small bit of fabric that barely covered her obviously hardened nipples as she bobbed and danced.

And Jason would have been a gentleman if she'd given any prior indication that she wanted him to be one, but clearly she didn't, because Batgirl was leaning her head back against his chest now and smiling delightedly up at him and - holy shit - grabbing his hands and sliding them lower over her breasts.

Oh, fuck. Jason was about to have a good night.

He groaned as they rubbed her boobs hand-in-hand and her toned ass was wiggling so enthusiastically against his cock that Jason finally couldn't stand not having his hands all over more of her body so he spun her around to face him.

Only to get whacked in the face by a Batwing.

She burst out laughing as he yelped but then he was up on her, hot and close and arms around her waist and caressing her butt as their dancing became a hell of lot less like dancing and a lot more like sex.

"Let's get out of here," she panted in his ear and he nodded, threading their fingers together and pulling her after him through the crowd, which parted for them like the Red Sea after the first few people yelled about getting hit by her wings as she walked by, thereby warning the others in her path to scatter.

Jason led her over to one of the crowded manor hallways containing a tiny, single person bathroom.

"You go in first," he said just loud enough that she could hear. "I'll give it a minute and join you."

Fake Batgirl gave him a radiant smile and negotiated her way into the tiny room, shutting the door behind her. Jason strolled down the hall and back again before knocking twice on the bathroom door and pushing it open.

He was surprised to see the lights off as he entered and grinned to himself.

Clever girl, this one, wanting to keep their liaison on the down low.

He pushed the door shut behind him and locked it, and then Batgirl was snapping the lights back on and reaching for him to take his mask off.

"Wait, wait," he said, laughing, pushing her hands away. "It's gonna ruin the fantasy to take our masks off."

She pouted.

"I can't kiss you with your mask on," Batgirl said. "Yours is a full face."

"Because I'm Red Hood," Jason bragged. "But… we could turn the lights back off?" he offered.

Her answer was for the half-bath to be plunged back into darkness before his mask was being pulled off and tossed aside, along with hers, and then her tongue was in his mouth as she flung her arms around his neck and began making out with him, hot and wet and needy.

And damn, she was a good kisser, too, and Jason let himself be dragged under her lead for a good few minutes, but then he was kissing her back and making her moan against his tongue as he bent low enough to grab her under the ass and sit her on the edge of the sink.

"Fuck, baby," Jason murmured as her hands went for his belt while his went for her zipper.

"I didn't know Batgirl went for the bad boys," he breathed in her ear before sucking the lobe into his mouth and nibbling on it while he got her dress undone.

She sighed and arched her back into his hands while wrapping her legs around his waist and grinding her pussy against him.

"It's hard being good all the time," she whined into his hair as she twisted her fingers through it.

"Batman has a lot of rules," she said, making Jason laugh, because if Party City Batgirl only knew.

Jason's lips moved down to her neck as she ran her fingers through his hair and began massaging his ears, making him moan as his cock twitched.

"Is that why you wear the hood?" she teased him as she kept rubbing, experimenting to find the best spots. "You have to protect your sensitive ears?" she giggled.

"You caught me," Jason mumbled, licking a path to her now fully exposed nipples.

"Oh, fuck," Batgirl gulped as he sucked one into his mouth.

His left hand came up to twist and massage her other nipple while he worked the first one over, sucking hard and then soft before nipping then licking the pain away.

"Fuck, Red Hood," Batgirl moaned, grabbing one of his hands and directing it to her very wet slit.

"You weren't wearing panties?" Jason said in delight, letting her boob fall out of his mouth as his fingers slipped along her smooth folds, caressing a steady path up and down that made her whimper.

"A thong," she panted, "but I took it off while I was waiting for you."

"That's my girl," Jason breathed, rubbing the knuckle of his thumb against her clit and making her cry out.

Jason kept his hand on Batgirl's waist as he dropped to his knees, finding her pussy in the dark with his lips.

"Oh, God," she yelped when his mouth latched around her clit and began to suck.

And God, she was a dream, draping her legs over his shoulders and pushing his head into her cunt and wailing so enthusiastically that Jason knew he'd have to thank Dick later for laying down a musical cover, because there was no way he wanted to muffle his girl's sounds as he ate her out, licking broad strokes from time to time up and down her slit as she leaned back against the faucet head to give him better access, balancing herself with her fishnet clad legs around his head which, Jason realized, made them about a thousand times hotter than they'd been on the dance floor.

"You like that, baby?" he asked her needlessly, pulling his mouth the barest bit back from her dripping pussy only to slip two fingers inside her.

Batgirl moaned and began wiggling her hips, but Jason wouldn't move his fingers.

"Tell me how much you like it," he ordered her. "Tell me how much you like fucking a bad boy, Batgirl," he said, starting to get into their roleplay.

And he didn't want to be an ass and think of another girl while he was inside this one, but damn, it would be hot if the real Batgirl would ever fuck him.

She wouldn't, though. She _was_ a good girl. She worked for Babs, for crying out loud. She'd let old Bats down too many times to walk on the wild side with the prodigal son of the family. She wanted to prove herself, force the Bats to take her seriously.

But, fuck.

Jason couldn't deny that thoughts of Steph were heating up his side of this fantasy date. Even if that did make him an ass.

But that's what roleplay was, right? Playing pretend.

Hell, maybe PCB would be flattered that he was pretending she was the real Batgirl. If she knew. Which she wouldn't.

"Red Hood," she whined. "Move your fingers," she pleaded as she tried unsuccessfully to wiggle against him, thanks to her precarious perch on the sink.

"Tell me what I want to hear," he commanded again.

"You like being a bad girl, don't you, Batgirl?" he asked her, deigning to give her clit the tiniest lick with his tongue, although his fingers still didn't move.

"Yes!" she panted. "I love being bad."

"And you love fucking bad boys?" Red Hood asked Batgirl, giving her cunt a tantalizing twist of his fingers.

"Yes," she moaned. "God, yes," she admitted. "I've wanted to fuck you for so long, Red Hood."

"That's my naughty girl," Jason whispered, replacing his mouth on her clit at the same time that he began to pump his fingers inside of her pussy.

Batgirl wailed and clutched his hair almost hard enough to rip it out, but that only turned Jason on more as he began searching for her g-spot.

She was whimpering and moaning softly as he worked her over, but all of a sudden he found the perfect place and she shrieked.

"Yes, fuck me right there, Red Hood!" she gasped as he began banging her pussy out with his hand and fingers.

"Fuck me with those trigger fingers!" she moaned.

Jason blinked. But didn't lose his rhythm.

"Fuck yeah, all the filthy things those fingers have done, how many people have you killed with those fingers?" Batgirl was babbling. "You gonna make me come with those killing machines?" she ranted as she did her best to thrust her hips off of the sink in time with his pulsing.

"Fuck yeah, I am, baby," Jason said when his amazement let him speak, because holy shit, this girl was crazy insanely hot.

For him.

The real him.

Oh, he was so getting her number after this.

"You like fucking a killer, baby?" Jason grunted against her, licking her slick in between words.

"You want to be a bad girl, come on a killer's hand? You gonna enjoy feeling all guilty about it every time Batman looks at you and you remember what you did?"

"Yes, _yes!_ " Batgirl was shrieking.

"God!" she screamed as she came hard, quivering and pulsing and leaking all over Jason's hand as he kept pumping her through it, helping her grind out the aftershocks as she came down.

"I need your cock inside of me right now," she ordered him as soon as he withdrew his hand.

"Yes, ma'am," Jason smirked in the dark, standing up and reaching into his back pocket for a condom, but she was fiddling with her fishnets and pressing a packet into his hand.

"Condom," she said.

"I have one," he said, trying to give hers back.

"Mine is purple," she said, and Jason paused.

And grinned.

Dear God, he liked this girl.

"It's going to be wasted with the lights off," he said kindly, still trying to give it back to her. "Save it for next time."

"It glows in the dark," Batgirl said cheerfully, ripping the packet open to show him.

And Jason couldn't help it.

He busted out laughing, in the dark in one of Bruce's guest bathrooms, in a fake Red Hood costume having fantastic sex with a ridiculously hot and ridiculously ridiculous fake Batgirl, who had a glow-in-the-dark purple condom.

Jason couldn't stop giggling and she was laughing, too, as she reached for his cock to put it on.

"I'm Batgirl," she said to him in between giggles. "Always prepared for any situation."

"I can see that," Jason said, because, indeed he could, the glowing purple condom lighting up his cock quite nicely.

"Come here, Batgirl," he said with genuine affection in his voice as he reached for her hips and slid himself inside of her.

He couldn't tell which of them gave the happy sigh when he was all the way in. Maybe it was both of them. Jason leaned forward and kissed Batgirl's neck as he held her still for a minute.

"You're fantastic," he said.

"So are you," she said back.

"You definitely need to give me your number after this, ok?" he said, pressing a kiss behind her ear.

"Will do, Red Hood," she smiled against his cheek, and he smiled too, before scooping her butt cheeks up in his hands and carefully carrying her in the dark to the wall without the towel rack.

"You ok?" he asked her as they both shifted around to try to get her balanced.

"I'm good," she said a second later after a final test bounce.

"Rock my world, Red Hood," she commanded. "For the second time," she added with a laugh.

"Anytime, Batgirl," Jason said, meaning it, he realized.

Which put a not at all unwelcome smile on his face.

He thrust up into her hard and fast.

"God, yes," Batgirl mumbled against his shoulder as the wall began to thump and shake with the force of his thrusts.

Which, fortunately, was so similar to the thumping of the bass that they would probably be in the clear when they made their escape.

And if not, well, they were in masks. No harm done, Jason figured, as long as Bruce didn't hear about it.

But it wasn't Bruce who was on his mind as he fucked his Fake Batgirl against the wall.

"You like having a killer's cock in you, baby?" Jason panted against her mouth. "How's that feel to have all that wickedness up inside you?"

"So good," Batgirl moaned, clearly loving the fantasy as much as he was.

"God, I needed this," she mumbled around the little noises that Jason was driving out of her throat.

"With you, Red Hood," she added, pulling Jason into a sexy, wet kiss as he fucked her.

"I needed this with you," she muttered before arching around a particularly good thrust.

"'M so tired of being good all the time," she whimpered. "Always following the rules. Doing what they tell me. I can't - I don't want to -"

She gasped as Jason ramped up his pounding, and he had to admit, one nice thing about the Lazarus Pit was his truly impressive strength and stamina when it came to sex.

Not that he'd had sex before getting killed, but, well, he'd been told things by enough grateful lovers at this point to be quite confident that his endurance was well above average.

Too bad he always ruined whatever gratitude and goodwill those women had for him by never calling them afterwards.

He was Red Hood. Relationships were a liability. As well as an impractibility.

What was he supposed to do, get a girlfriend and then explain that he couldn't ever sleep over because nighttime was the best time to go kill bad guys? Right, that would go over well. Not to mention how he'd endanger the entire Bat operation if he revealed his identity to anyone.

But this time? With this girl?

Jason really liked this chick. And she liked Red Hood, even if she didn't realize she was fucking the man himself.

Screw the old man and screw the Batfamily. Jason was going to make this work.

"You don't have to be good for me," he told Batgirl as he gave her what she needed. "I like you bad," he grinned against her mouth as she made incoherent noises.

"Fuck Batman," Jason added, really getting into the roleplay, because his girl liked it, so why the hell not?

"You gonna listen to Batman from now on or are you gonna fuck Red Hood?" Jason demanded, starting to forget who he was talking to.

Batgirl's arms were gripping him tight around his neck as she breathed out, "Red Hood."

"That's right, baby. Say my name. Say you're gonna fuck Red Hood from now on," Jason growled out.

"I'm gonna fuck Red Hood," Batgirl moaned, lolling her head back against the wall as her orgasm approached.

"God," she panted, "I'm gonna fuck Red Hood so hard, all the time," she panted out in between thrusts, "on his killer cock -"

"Come on that killer cock for me, Batgirl," Jason ordered. "Come all over it with your bad girl cunt, show the Bats who you really are -"

Batgirl cried out and came hard, her pussy squeezing Jason's cock tight as it milked her orgasm out of her. Her legs gripped his butt as she trembled and shook around him and then Jason was giving a few more short thrusts and coming, too, moaning low and hard as he pulsed inside of her.

They were both sweaty and panting hard, foreheads leaning against each other, for a long minute before Jason carefully pulled out and let her down before removing and tying off the condom.

He heard Batgirl's heavy breathing in the dark as he did up his pants and felt around for their masks on the floor.

"Can you zip my dress back up?" she asked him as he set the masks on the sink.

He pressed a kiss to the back of her shoulder as he felt for the zipper in the dark and got her set back in order.

"That was insane," Batgirl breathed out as she turned around and wrapped her arms around his chest.

"You're really into roleplay, huh," Jason chuckled as he wrapped his arms around her and rocked her into him.

"You, too, it seems like," Batgirl said with a smile in her voice.

"What can I say?" Jason said. "There's a reason I came to the party as Red Hood."

"There's a reason I came as Batgirl," she agreed with him before letting out a long, contented sigh against his shoulder.

"I need your phone number," Jason said after a minute, kissing the top of her head before pulling his phone out from his pocket.

"Here," she said, grabbing their masks and handing his to him.

"Don't spoil the mystery yet," she grinned as she put hers back on. "This was too much fun."

"Oh, I could definitely go for a little more anonymous roleplay sex before I see that beautiful face of yours," Jason said with a smile, turning on his phone once his mask was in place.

"Who says my face is beautiful?" Batgirl teased.

"Your pussy," Jason answered without missing a beat, making her laugh.

"You really did come in the best costume," she said to him as Jason pulled up his new contact form.

"Second best," he grinned behind his mask. "I didn't have wings. Are yours all bent up?" he asked her with some concern.

"Oh, let's see," she said, fumbling for the light.

She turned to inspect her slightly crooked wings in the mirror. Jason reached out and began trying to smooth them out before giggling.

"There's purple glitter on the wall," he said, pointing.

"Oh, shit," Batgirl said, her eyes wide. "I better scrub that off," she muttered, wetting some toilet paper.

"Oh fuck, my thong," she added with a laugh, just noticing it on the floor and attempting to shimmy back into it with her tall heels.

"Phone number," Jason reminded her, after laughing and pulling her panties up for her.

She rattled it off to him while doing her best to clean off the bathroom wall. Jason had just finished typing it into his phone when a text message popped up.

_R caught by SC. Urgent backup needed._

"Fuck," Jason gasped on an inhale, quickly making sure all his clothes were in place.

"What's wrong?" Batgirl asked him, turning around, toilet paper in hand.

"Babe, I'm so sorry, I gotta run," Jason said, his words tumbling over themselves in his panic over Damian and the absolute shit timing of bailing on his newfound girl.

"Red Hood emergency," Jason said, shoving his phone into his pocket as soon as it buzzed with the address from Oracle.

"I'll call you as soon as I'm done, ok?" he said anxiously.

"I promise," he added, tipping the chin of his mask up to give her a quick kiss before bolting out the bathroom door.

Steph stared after him, eyes wide, before abruptly remembering to lock the door again and finish getting cleaned up. But it wasn't thirty seconds later that her phone buzzed, too.

"Fuck," she whispered when she saw the text.

She was about to dash out of the bathroom when she paused in her tracks and stared at the closed door.

Party City Red Hood had also just gotten a text and gone running.

"Are you kidding me?" she whispered, not sure if it was fear or shame or excitement that suddenly laced through her belly.

But she didn't have time to analyze that now, because Scarecrow had somehow gotten his hands on Damian, who had been out patrolling alone that night due to the adults-only masquerade, with Oracle as back-up on comms.

Because despite Bruce's insistent maneuvering of the rest of the Batfamily into attending his Wayne Foundation gala, Babs had given the Big Bat one raised eyebrow and declined.

And damned if he hadn't let her.

Stupid fucking guilt over her paralysis, is what it was, Steph grumbled to herself as her Batwings knocked into person after person as she ran through the halls without even muttering an apology.

She'd been fucking tortured by Black Mask, but had Bruce let her out of the party? Nooooo, she had to come.

Not that she could really complain at this point.

But she didn't have time to think about that now. She had to go save Damian. Who had probably gotten a huge dose of some new strain of fear gas, because he surely would have had the normal antidotes on him.

But his gas mask, he should have had a gas mask in his belt, shouldn't he? Did that mean he was hurt, too? Oh, fuck, fuck, fuck.

Steph slammed her thumbprint against the privacy locks sealing the door to the family-only portion of Wayne Manor that was closed to guests and went running even faster once she was safely in the empty hallways.

In the Batcave, she didn't see Bruce or Tim or Dick so she had to wrestle her zipper down the back of her dress herself before ripping off her dress and fishnets and wrangling her way into the spare suit that she kept here for emergencies.

Maybe the others had beat her there? Or they could be stuck in conversations they couldn't gracefully exit? Or having sex in other bathrooms throughout the manor?

Oh, shit, Steph thought to herself.

At least Jason was already on his way.

She'd never talked to Jason much. He wasn't around often, for one thing, and Steph wasn't a Wayne, for another thing, so they rarely crossed paths.

But Steph knew how much Bruce disapproved of Jason's methods and how much the Bat and the Hood fought.

They loved each other, sure, but Jason was going to kill if he thought killing was needed, which Bruce could never let go without a lot of yelling and lectures and fuming and, well, Steph wasn't an idiot.

She knew how much the other Bats had doubted her abilities at first and she'd instinctively shied away from getting tangled up with Red Hood on cases and operations. She didn't need to go swaying the Batfamily's disfavor towards Jason in her direction.

So she'd thought.

Now?

There was a whole lot of tangling up that she wanted to do with Red Hood.

Ohmigod, Steph thought to herself again as she whizzed out of the Batcave on the Batcycle. Did she really, seriously, just have the world's greatest bathroom sex with Jason?

But she really, seriously, had to focus, because Damian was in trouble. Steph had put her gas mask on before heading out in case fear toxin was lingering in the air around the warehouse where Damian's implanted tracker said that Scarecrow had taken him.

"What's the sitch, Oracle?" she called over the comms as she sped closer to the manufacturing district.

"I don't know," came the frustrated reply. "I think Damian was lured in. He called in about a large gang of henchmen with heavy arms threatening the movie theatre at Gotham Plaza and he was engaged in combat with them before the fear toxin went off."

"They were a diversion so he wouldn't have his mask on?" Steph guessed, with a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach.

"That's my guess," Oracle said tightly. "Crane was probably fishing for Batman, too, hoping they'd both be there. Getting the Bats high on his shit is the highlight of his pathetic life, since we usually have the masks and antidotes."

"Fuck," Steph muttered.

"Exactly," Babs agreed. "Damian's obviously gotten dosed, his life meter readings are all over the place, but it's consistent with how fear toxin usually presents, at least," she sighed in misery.

"Who else is on the way?" Steph asked quietly as she closed in on the row of warehouses and cut back on her throttle so she'd come in quiet.

"Red Hood just went in," Oracle said, confirming the butterflies in Steph's tummy.

"Batman's a few minutes behind you. Nightwing was drunk off his ass," Babs grumbled.

"It was a party," Steph pointed out.

"I know," Oracle said tiredly. "I just wish we had all hands on deck for Robin."

"I know," Steph said softly, not liking the spikes of fear and dread that shot through her at the thought of losing another Robin.

 _No,_ she told herself. _No, no, no. Not gonna happen._

"Red Robin is in the Batcave to hold down the fort," Oracle was adding. "I wanted someone to stay back in case things went south at the warehouse and we needed to revise our tactical strategy."

"Roger that," Steph said. "I'm going in," she said.

"Get him back," Oracle replied.

"We will," Steph promised.

She hopped off her bike and ran lightly towards Warehouse 308, scanning the exterior for her best means of entry. Jonathan Crane wasn't a fool. He knew the Bats tended to come in through the roof. But, much like Vizzini from _The Princess Bride_ , Steph found herself vacillating between options.

_He knows that we know that he knows that we use the roof, so maybe he's guarding the ground level more closely. But he'd know that we'd be expecting him to guard the ground level, so maybe he's guarding the roof._

_Oh, fuck it,_ Steph thought, shooting her grappling hook up to a mid-level window which she cautiously looked through before breaking and entering.

She found herself in a small, mostly empty storeroom, some cardboard boxes scattered around the floor along with yellowed papers.

Steph ran to the door and peered cautiously into the darkened hallway. She pulled her night vision goggles out of her BatBelt and clipped them over her cowl before creeping out of the room.

Damian would be screaming if they didn't have him gagged, she thought to herself. And they probably didn't have him gagged, because Scarecrow was such a sick fuck that he liked to document his victims' reactions to his different strains of fear toxin.

Steph didn't hear anything in this particular hall, but she glanced through the doors of the rooms she passed anyway. She wasn't going to take a chance on missing little D.

As she rounded the corner, she heard the quiet chirp of a silencer.

"Red Hood?" she whispered, pressing her comm button so he'd hear her.

"I think I'm on right on top of you," she said, before realizing her double entendre and mentally groaning.

Well, at least Jason probably didn't realize yet that the real Batgirl and the one he'd just fucked were one and the same, she comforted herself.

"Copy that, Batgirl," she heard back in the distorted voice that the hood produced for Jason. "Stay put," he told her.

She leaned back against the corner so she couldn't be seen before gasping quietly as Red Hood silently burst into view, guns in hand and scanning for enemies.

"Crane's got Robin on the base level," he said. "But I'm clearing the guards from the top down so we'll have a clean extraction."

"Good," Steph said whole-heartedly, knowing damn well that he meant a lifetime removal of the trash and not giving one single fuck, because they had Damian and they needed to die.

Red Hood tipped his head at her and Steph realized that he hadn't been expecting her positive response.

"What should I do?" she asked him.

He hesitated for the barest second.

"You good covering my six?" he asked her. "You can't start taking out the lower guards yet or they'll know we're here."

"I'm good," Steph said firmly. "Let's go."

Red Hood, despite the fact that the hood was covering his face, seemed to be giving her all kinds of funny looks, but he led the way.

He'd fully expected, if not a lecture or an argument from the exceptionally obedient and loyal-to-the-Bats Batgirl, than at least a refusal to accompany him on his murder spree.

But she hadn't seem fazed. In fact… she maybe seemed pleased?

Well, that was weird. Real Batgirl might have a few things in common with his Pretend Batgirl after all.

But that didn't mean that Jason would be so dumb as to ditch the most amazing lay of his life in the hopes of scoring the authentic version, who, in all honesty, would probably never want him, even if she did have the balls to do what was needed to save Damian.

Nah, Jason didn't need Real Batgirl. His pretend version suited him just fine. And he was gonna call her and apologize for running out on her as soon as this was over.

But Real Batgirl was taking out some guards behind him with batarangs while he shot the ones in front of him, and she wasn't batting an eye when he turned back to kill the ones she'd knocked out.

Real Batgirl was perhaps not such a bad teammate, Jason decided.

Together, they finished sweeping the second level, and were mapping out their assault on the main level when Batman swooped up in front of them.

"Report," the Bat said grimly.

"Top two levels cleared of guards, Crane's got Robin in the back of the main level, he's bugging out on fear toxin for sure, I heard him on my recon," Jason said, his body language betraying the dismay that his voice modulator didn't reveal.

"All right," Batman said. "Red Hood, you and I will come in from the back. You get Robin to safety and I'll disable Crane and the closest guards. Batgirl, wait until we begin our assault, then make your attack from the front."

"Roger that," Steph said immediately.

"Copy," Red Hood growled, for once not willing to waste time arguing about methodology, although he knew exactly why Bruce was having him be the one to pull Damian out.

Batman had seen the guns in Jason's hands and holsters, even if he, too, wasn't wasting time with arguments.

Those would come later tonight, Jason was quite sure, but as long as they got Damian home safely, Bruce could yell at him as much as he wanted, Jason thought to himself.

Batman pressed a syringe into Red Hood's hand.

"It'll be easier to get Robin out if he's sedated," the Bat said and Red Hood grunted his agreement, slipping the syringe into the inner pocket of his jacket.

"Let's go," Batman said, and he and Red Hood slipped off towards the back of the building while Steph finished making her way to the front.

Damian's screams and pleas and desperate begging for the ghouls to leave him alone assaulted Steph's ears as soon as she made it to the walkway overhanging the wide open space of the main level.

She took in a ragged breath and willed her empathy to numbness. She had to focus now. Plenty of time to pity Damian and comfort him later.

Steph watched from the shadows, waiting for her signal. Damian was pulled back underneath the overhanging second story, so far back that Steph couldn't see him, but she could see the front line of guards who Batman would be taking out.

They deserved to die, too, a little voice whispered in her head, but no time to worry about that now. Jason would probably get their names and hunt them all down later, Steph thought to herself, surprised to find a smile flitting about her lips at the thought.

Nobody fucked with a Robin.

The sooner Batman learned that, the better.

There was a shout and then some yelling and then the guards were tumbling, felled by batarangs and batbolas and then Batgirl was flying down from the shadows, a blur in the warehouse as she attacked and hit and flung her weapons and punched and kicked Damian's kidnappers into submission.

Batman was working his way to the middle of the warehouse and Steph fought her way to him until they were back to back, knocking out attacker after attacker until a calm descended and only muffled groaning and the twitching of bound victims could be heard.

"Zip ties," Batman said briskly, and Batgirl nodded, already pulling them out and making her way to each asshole, securing their wrists and feet as quickly - and ferociously - as she could before moving on to the next one.

She glanced towards the back of the warehouse as she worked, but didn't see either Damian or Red Hood, and assumed that was good news.

"He's secure," Batman grunted to her, noticing her concern, and Steph's breath flew out in a whoosh and she paused for just a second in her much less joyful clean-up work to let the cool rush of gratitude replace the anxiety boiling in her chest.

When the last henchman was secured, Batman made his way back over to Scarecrow, pulling the knocked out villain to his feet with an angry growl.

"I'm taking him straight back to Arkham," the Bat told Steph.

"You go back to the Batcave. Don't wait for the police," he said, and Steph nodded, not needing Bruce to explain that they were fleeing the scene due to Red Hood's cache of dead bodies on the upper levels.

Bruce was out the door of the warehouse in an instant, dragging Scarecrow behind him, and Steph was about to follow, when she paused.

An evil smile crossed her face.

On the Batcycle, she felt like she couldn't get back to the Batcave fast enough.

For Damian, first and foremost. She knew Alfred would be doing everything he could to stabilize the boy as he suffered through the nightmares that he was no doubt experiencing even under sedation.

But also, Steph needed to resolve this strange identity crisis with Jason, and it was starting to make her nervous.

She hadn't felt shy at all about fucking some strange guy whose face she never even saw.

But fucking Jason? She knew Jason.

Sort of.

Enough to feel worried and embarrassed and afraid that he'd hate her or, barely better, never want to date her, and not only that, would the two of them then be awkward and weird around each other?

Undoubtedly.

And the rest of the Bats would notice, because they were perceptive like that, and then they'd all know that she'd fucked Jason, but accidentally, and -

Steph had never been more relieved to pull into the Batcave.

"How's Damian?" she asked as soon as she ran into the medbay, cowl in hand.

Tim was pacing in agitation, Dick was bawling, Alfred was scolding Dick while trying to track Damian's numbers on the monitors, and Jason, his face bare from both hood and domino, was gripping Damian's little hand in his large one and gently stroking his hair while the boy muttered in Arabic and writhed on the bed.

"He will survive, of course," Alfred sighed, not saying anything else as he pursed his lips up in a frown while continuing to scan the readouts.

Tears filled Steph's eyes as she moved around the cot to sit across from Jason on Damian's opposite side, picking up his little hand and pressing tiny kisses to it before cradling it in hers.

Jason's eyes met hers.

"You get all the fuckers?" he asked her.

"Zip tied," Steph murmured under her breath and Jason ground his teeth but didn't say anything.

"What's your phone number?" Steph whispered to Jason when Alfred finally tore himself away from Damian to once and for all escort the weeping Dick out of the medbay.

"You are not helping, sir!" Alfred was saying to him, irritation evident in his voice as the still very drunk Dick wailed and stumbled his way along, followed by a concerned Tim.

"Why do you need my number?" Jason asked Steph, raising an eyebrow.

"I have some evidence you should see," Steph smirked as she pulled her phone out, still holding Damian's hand in one of hers.

Both of Jason's eyebrows went up, but he gave her his number.

Steph tapped furiously on her phone for a minute, and a long minute later Jason's phone buzzed with several incoming text alerts.

A slow smile spread across his face as he scrolled through the multitude of photos she had sent.

"If I didn't know better," Jason said slowly, raising markedly friendlier eyes up to Steph, "I would say this is a hit list."

"No more dead Robins," Steph said grimly.

"No more dead Robins," Jason agreed, looking startled but not displeased.

He began scrolling through the photos again on his phone but suddenly froze.

Very slowly, he raised his eyes up to meet Steph's.

Very calmly, she looked back at him.

Jason hit the call button on his phone and Steph's phone rang.

"Hello?" she said, picking it up.

"I told you I'd call as soon as I finished that thing I had to do," Red Hood said into his phone while looking into the eyes of his not-so-pretend Batgirl.

"It turns out I had to do a thing, too," Steph said to him, a slow smile spreading across her face.

"Yeah?" Jason said to her. "How'd that go?" he asked her, still talking into his phone, but smiling wide and sexy as he kept eye contact.

"You tell me," said Steph, her eyes taking on a hint of vulnerability.

"I would say," Jason said, shutting his phone off and leaning towards her, "that Red Hood and Batgirl make a pretty damn good team."

"I would agree," Steph said softly, putting her phone away, too.

"I would also say," Jason said, getting up and moving around to Steph's side of the cot, "that Red Hood would very much like to make fucking Batgirl a regular thing."

"I would have to say that Batgirl is very much ok with that idea," Steph said, her heart fluttering with happiness as Jason pulled her up to her feet and slid his arms around her waist.

"You seriously came to the party as Batgirl," Jason chuckled against her mouth as Steph wrapped her arms around his neck and leaned into him.

"You came as Red Hood," Steph pointed out with a grin before pressing a sweet kiss to his lips.

"But I did not have a glow-in-the-dark red condom," Jason said, making Steph sigh and shake her head.

"That was a serious lack of preparation, Red Hood," she said. "I question if you're even a Bat."

"You and Bruce both," Jason smirked as he leaned down and kissed Steph harder.

"I think we're going to have to start questioning your Bat credentials pretty soon, though, too, Batgirl," he whispered in her ear after a minute.

"Good job getting those photos, baby," he added, making a thrill run through her as he squeezed her waist tight.

Steph let out a long sigh as she relaxed into his chest.

"I meant what I said," she murmured.

"I know," Jason said back, thinking over her expressed frustration about following the Bats' rules all the time.

"Wait," he said suddenly, remembering something else.

"You've really wanted to fuck me for a long time?" he asked her.

She blushed but didn't drop her gaze.

"Mostly as a fantasy," she mumbled. "I didn't think it would work in real life…"

"So you've been thinking about me whenever you masturbate?" Jason asked her, his grin getting even bigger.

"Uh huh," Steph said with a seductive smile.

"You like that, Red Hood? You like that your Batgirl thinks of you when she's getting herself off?" she teased.

"Hell, yeah, I do," Jason said enthusiastically, puffing up with pride.

"But I was thinking about you, too," he admitted.

"When?" Steph asked him. "Recently?"

"When I was fucking you," Jason said, "I was thinking how hot it would be if the real you would ever fuck me. But then I got so into fake you that I didn't want the real you anymore," he admitted with a grin, making Steph's face get all soft and tender.

"That's so sweet," she said, peppering his lips with little kisses.

"You're not disappointed that fake me is real me, though, are you?" she asked him.

"Baby," Jason said in disbelief. "As soon as the kid wakes up and is ok, I am gonna spend the next week straight showing you how not disappointed I am."

"Oh, I am _so_ ok with that," Steph sighed with a happy grin as Alfred walked back into the room, followed by a worried, uncowled Bruce.

Who gave Steph and Jason a strange look while Alfred looked at them curiously.

"We're dating, by the way," Steph said to them cheerfully.

"Since when?" Bruce said gruffly, sitting down beside Damian and running his hand through the boy's hair before picking up his hand as Jason had.

"Earlier tonight," Jason smirked.

"Thanks for forcing me to come to your stupid party, Pops. Best night ever," he bragged while Steph glowed.

Bruce tore his eyes away from Damian to look at the two of them, aghast.

"Do I want to know?" he finally said.

"No," said Jason.

"Definitely not," said Steph. "And Alfred, I tried _really_ hard to get all the glitter off the wall."

"Which wall, Miss Stephanie?" Alfred gasped, his eyebrows going through the roof.

"You don't want to know," Jason promised him. "And Steph cleaned it up. As much as she could."

"Dear God," Alfred murmured under his breath, wiping his brow and making a mental note to remind the extra cleaning staff to wipe down _all_ of the walls in the manor especially well tomorrow morning.

And to alert him at once to the presence of any glitter.

When Damian blinked his harrowed eyes in the morning and came back to himself once the fear toxin had finally run its course, he was most surprised, and oddly touched, to find a sleeping Bruce folded over his cot, with his head laying on his son's chest.

Damian noticed Dick snoring in the corner, with Tim slumped against his shoulder, actually dozing himself for once. Pennyworth was sleeping sitting upright in an overstuffed armchair that had been pulled into the room from somewhere in the manor, and Babs was stretched out asleep on the next cot over.

"Hey, kid," Damian heard a soft voice say from his left. "How ya feeling?"

Damian turned his head and saw a very much awake Jason sitting with his legs stretched out in a chair next to his cot, with an equally awake Stephanie curled up in his lap.

How curious, Damian thought, before a shudder passed through his body, reminding him of the nightmares and visions he'd been tormented with for the last twelve hours.

"I…" Damian started to say. "I am… uncertain," he finally said slowly.

Jason and Steph's eyes were heavy with sympathy as they regarded him.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Steph asked him softly. "What you saw?"

Damian shivered.

But he could not deny that Brown's offer had merit.

"Perhaps later," Damian said quietly, fingering the sheet between his fingers that could still feel the sticky blood of his victims, so many victims, who had haunted his dreams.

"I should have been more alert," Damian said in frustration.

"No, D," Steph insisted, reaching out to grasp his hand in hers.

"Habibi," Jason said. "I saw the footage afterwards. You were fighting to protect the Friday night crowd at the movies and if you hadn't been so focused on taking down the henchmen with the machine guns, they would have started shooting and killed almost everyone at the Plaza as soon as they got hit with the fear toxin."

"You did good, little D," Jason said. "You saved lives."

"Crane did not spare his own men from the gas?" Damian said in surprise. "Most dishonorable," he muttered.

"Well, I have a feeling this is going to be Scarecrow's last quest," Jason said very softly, but with a steel in his tone that caught Damian's ears.

"Jason already took out two thirds of his crew," Steph murmured, glancing at Bruce to make sure he was still sleeping as a tiny smile began to creep onto Damian's face.

"And Steph got me the faces of the rest," Jason added equally quietly, reaching out to rub Damian's shoulder.

"No one's gonna have a second chance to hurt you," Jason promised him.

"Thank you, ahki," Damian whispered in relief. "And Stephanie," he added, who nodded and smiled at him.

"You are dating?" Damian asked them, wrinkling his brow.

"Yep," Jason said.

Damian sniffed.

"It is about time," he said.

"D?" Steph said in surprise.

"Tt," he said. "You and Todd are clearly compatible and vastly well suited for each other. It is a wonder that you avoided him for so long."

Steph's jaw dropped as Jason's shoulders began to shake.

"I was trying to be a good Batgirl," Steph hissed in a whisper. "Obey the rules. Avoid the bad apples in the family."

Damian looked at her thoughtfully.

"I prefer the bad apples," he peacefully declared before shutting his eyes.

"Me, too," said Jason, kissing Steph's ear.

"Me, three," she sighed, kissing him back.

_The End_

**Author's Note:**

> Ahem. 
> 
> I don't know if I should be embarrassed or proud. 
> 
> But I'm definitely putting another notch in my Romance Writer Pen XD 
> 
> If you like JaySteph, check out the Tumblr blog @fyeahjaysteph for fanfic recs, fanart, and incorrect quotes. 
> 
> Also, there's a new JaySteph Discord you can join! The link is on the above blog. 
> 
> Fanfiction writers are thirsty vampires and comments are our lifeblood. 🧛🩸😁  
> (But if you are mean, we will cut a bitch. Cuz we are vampires rawr 🦇)


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